For the past while, the world has been spinning on a broken axis. Not the broken arrow of military fame, but a basis point askew. From whence cam the idea that the best of the best in the coffee world is that which is most oft purchased? Nay, I say. I want the coffee from which the greatest sapidity is derived.
Now are there locations of all stripes and strips, mall upon sordid mile of them. Where to stop, shop and consume? Squabs squeam about pondering the next souk vending the latest Tawny liquid. In the end it is not the nectar being proffered to the masses, it is all that is added to thusly brewed progeniture.
I am sure sugar would make steak taste good, but I Hazzard County counting the number of steak houses offering it along with salt and pepper on the dolly. I know it’s a bit of a compliment when a complement to your favourite beverage is offered. And with Boss Hogg on your bacon, you can be assured of a real bellied porker.
The vast majority of coffee drunk or sober now has additives not unlike those of a soda fountain. Now for all of you who hate this phrase, back in the day, when Diners served dinners, coffee was mostly black, wussies wore it white, and wimps took a cube off the ole block. Now the names have more syllables than a Coffee Guy blog post.
I know as a non-cultural attaché to the Coffee world I should be more for than agin’ the server of the godly nectar. It is the utter disdain for the purity of creed which disturbs me. Now you find kinder kindt sipping on their java mix sartorially adorned in the latest garb. You have soccer and hockey moms in total clutch with their brew shifting into drive.
My mission should I choose to accept it will be to regain the strength and purity of the clan. I will push forth politically for every vendor and window to have either/and/or a straight Coffee only window, black only line, or nonetheless areas. How many times have you been able to use that phrase since the sixties?
I can’t wait, literally.
Mark Hull Du Calumet, First of the coterie of York, Son of Don, Scion of Karl in the House of Pfunkstadt, Connubial of Suzanne, Yeoman to the Hun of Honda, Prevailing in the Seat of Hespeler, Having been again to Australia, and now Grandad's Land.
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