Now as a reviewer, I rarely go out on a limb and make a written statement. And after all, with what can you lade an untrained review? Merely a modicum of mustard? Sosa I am out on the board for sententious surf around the ole interweb thingy, and I stumble across Yelp!
Perhaps I am not as well surfed as one might be in this day and age of mileage mastering mutt-heads. My wave curls up at www.yelp.ca and my astonished restaurant ears prick up. I feel hackles rising on the back of my neck. This is where I go to dis those unrepentant, disgorgant, ignorami, feeble attempts, godawful, libidinous, heinous, wannabes in the industry.
A veritable free-for-all in the rating of your dining pleasure. And I quote,
“This old English major’s heart is warmed by the news that the new synthetic cell carries a line from James Joyce, inscribed in its DNA: “To live, to err, to fall, to triumph, to recreate life out of life. ”What would Joyce have thought if someone had told him that one day that the synthesized genome of a goat pathogen would carry his words?
Now that really makes me wanna order the Rack of Lamb! After all, we are what we eat! Now the hemp really hits the loom when you can go to the Coffeemachine web site and buy Fruit of the Loom Underwear. Just what I intended. Curling along on my long-board looking for a new doodad to brew my morning nectar on, and what do they try to flog me? Skivvies?
Enough, I say! Nay, you retort! More un-restrained fast floating and I come across more abomination. Mayan Plaid Coffee Collection! Whhhhhaaaatttt! Has this whole world gone bonkers? From a web site spelled “cojolya” and perhaps should have been spelled Cajole You. As they wheedle you into coming to the site for something real.
Nope nadda again. Just give it to me straight. No cream, no sugar.
Mark Hull Du Calumet, First of the coterie of York, Son of Don, Scion of Karl in the House of Pfunkstadt, Connubial of Suzanne, Yeoman to the Hun of Honda, Prevailing in the Seat of Hespeler , Having been again to Australia
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